A chair at the bedside

My father was recently critically ill. We had to shift him thrice within 48 hours to different hospitals – due to a lack of confirmed availability of ICU beds – a topic for another post.

For 48 hours I did not get to sit – because there was no stool or chair at the bedside in any of the hospitals we went to. Apart from the expected exhaustion of taking care of a sick family member – this aspect added to the stress and frustration.

Later when he was finally in the ICU, this issue persisted.

There was no stool or chair by the bedside in the ICU, not was there even a foot of space to keep one, or to accommodate a wheelchair. How would a disabled visitor meet a patient in this setting?

My mother, who is herself elderly and has had knee replacement surgery – was unable to spend time with him even during the limited visiting hours. Because she would be in pain due to standing. The one time she did stand for long, she was in pain afterwards.

I remember a few years ago when she was in the ICU herself after her knee surgery and my father would go visit her, he barely stayed for a few minutes, again because having to stand exhausted him.

There are countless tasks that family members have to do for loved ones, making meals, bringing things to and fro from the hospital, taking difficult decisions with incomplete information and knowledge, managing their own and each others emotions. Many do not get any sleep and do not eat well.

The least we can do is give them a place to sit.